Love and Limerence

In this reading, the idea of the experience of “limerence” is explained in great detail.  Limerence is described as the experience in falling in love.  Limerence is also more than just sexual attraction.  Instead of just longing for sex, limerence is the idea of wanting reciprocation, as described in the text.  Limerence is similar to the idea of love at first sight, or  “a love potion, a dart from Cupid’s bow, the enchantment cast by a sorcerer.” It is unknown why limerence sparks at a certain time with a certain, it just happens.   As described by some of the interviewees, the sudden interest in someone is almost uncontrollable and you feel an instant attraction toward that person from maybe just a simple glance or smile.  It happens so suddenly, and this limerence sneaks up on you before you even realize it.

            Further into the reading, the “LO” (limerent object) is described.  The LO is the person that is being fell in love with.  Once a person finds him or herself experiencing this idea of limerence, the LO is all they can think about.  Everything about the LO seems perfect, and their flaws are no longer relevant in your eyes.  Certain aspects of the LO interest you immediately like their hair or the way they smile or their humor.  As described in the passage,  “the characteristics of the LO’s attractive characteristics are exaggerated and unattractive characteristics given little or no attention.”  Basically the positive aspects of the LO are enhanced and their negative aspects are basically invisible. 

            Limerence is also perceived as a condition of cognitive obsession.  The LO is constantly intruding into the other person’s mind and like an obsession is it is hard to think about anything else.  The person under the experience of limerence is constantly thinking about and rehearsing their next move with the LO and repeatedly planning what they are going to do next.  The passage gives an example of this from the famous movie “Rocky” when Sylvestor Stallone rehearses what he is going to say to Adrienne, or in this case, his LO.